I was chatting with a friend --- a single mum handling a mentally unsound husband, and 3 kids who were into glue-sniffing, school-skipping, underaged sex and wrong company. They have had their share of counselling, court appearances and rehabilitation programs.

How have they turned out?

Two out of three are walking the straight and narrow. That's great!

But what struck me is that the youngest has hardened his heart towards the law.
He has joined a more 'mature' gang that accepts him, admires his guts and gives him the 'honor' and responsibility beyond his age.
Moreover, while his mum has always been worried about his aimless life, he has assured her that if anything happens to him, she will receive a big lump sum of money. (Believe me.....no mother in her right mind would or should ever trade a child for cash!)

His goal in life now is to get a lot of money so that his family will have a more comfortable life --- his mum will not have to struggle physically and financially. His siblings will not be looking scrawny and undernourished. And his absent father will not look down on him as a failure and a good-for-nothing fella.

Surely what he's thinking is good?....In fact what he's doing certainly seems selfless and sacrificial.
But is he doing the right thing???

How often we all do the good thing (eg. help the kid with his project or assignment, wake him up for school, bail him out when he's running late, excuse him when he forgets to do his chores, buy whatever toy/game the kid wants --- not needs) ?

Can we see the consequences of doing the good thing?

When we do something nice because we think it's kind and helpful to someone, when in fact, we are making the person relinquish his own responsibility THEN we are carrying his monkey!
When things don't turn out right, who gets the blame? We do! But why should we?

The kid is responsible for his own project, he is responsible for getting to school on time, he has to save enough money from his own allowance to buy the toy/game he wants ---- parents buy what he needs.

I know we all have good hearts, good intentions. But let's do the right thing ----let's give the monkey back to the right owner!!!