Tuesday, October 03, 2006 Say sorry!
OOoops! Just discovered today---- 24 years late---- that my parenting style was wrong!!!
As I was preparing to share some thoughts at a Mother Support Group about "Discipline", I read this article by Ian Grant that said: "You can't make a child sorry -- You can train them to take responsibility for hurting someone else". Hmm... I was looking back at the early years of bringing up my kids. Whenever they had hurt each other physically or with their 'punch' words that made the other sibling cry, I would make them hug each other, look each other in the eye, and say sorry to each other. I thought I was being fair --- it didn't matter which party was wrong ---- both had to say sorry! But this article highlighted the fact that "sorry" is an emotion. We can't force an emotion, a feeling on others. Emotions cannot be commanded into being! So....when I told my kids to "Say sorry!", I was actually teaching them to lie if they were not actually sorry!!! Ahh....I guess I'll do better when I have grandchildren!
link | posted by Coach Jonathan Wong at 7:18 PM |
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