Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Say sorry!

OOoops! Just discovered today---- 24 years late---- that my parenting style was wrong!!!

As I was preparing to share some thoughts at a Mother Support Group about "Discipline", I read this article by Ian Grant that said:

"You can't make a child sorry -- You can train them to take responsibility
for hurting someone else".


Hmm... I was looking back at the early years of bringing up my kids.

Whenever they had hurt each other physically or with their 'punch' words that made the other sibling cry, I would make them hug each other, look each other in the eye, and say sorry to each other.
I thought I was being fair --- it didn't matter which party was wrong ---- both had to say sorry!

But this article highlighted the fact that "sorry" is an emotion. We can't force an emotion, a feeling on others. Emotions cannot be commanded into being!
So....when I told my kids to "Say sorry!", I was actually teaching them to lie if they were not actually sorry!!!

Ahh....I guess I'll do better when I have grandchildren!


link | posted by Coach Jonathan Wong at 7:18 PM |


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